My family dismissed my feelings about being single and gave me a sexist book

I’m 37F and single. The other night, I got upset while talking to my mum and sister about how hard it is, how I worry I won’t find someone, and how even men my own age make comments about my age. And it’s horrible to feel your value diminish in men’s eyes like that and it’s making me lose my confidence. I ended up leaving in tears, I had a few to drink and I am frustrated about a lack of support and one particular incident with my sister when I asked to join her and her fiance and other friends in the pub during a big match and she said I couldn’t because it was ‘couples vibes’ which has made me feel quite upset. I wasn’t looking for solutions, just support and a little more from them in spending time with me and helping me feel a little less alone. I think I shouldn’t have left, I didn’t hear from either of them afterwards. And it wasn’t mentioned about a week later the both asked me other random quearions and I ignored because I didn’t want to speak to them when they don’t seem to care about my feelings, then on Valentine’s Day I received a book in the post about “how to find a husband after 35.”

When I looked up the book, it seemed sexist—basically telling women to settle that I have to market myself always look my best etc. I felt humiliated and hurt, like they were saying my situation is my fault and that I just need to try harder to “fix” it. I tried to laugh it off at first, but deep down it really stung. I messaged today to find out who sent it. I asked my mum did you send me the book? She replied I did. Don’t kill me.

I explained it hurt my feelings and that it was agreeing with the societal pressures and reinforcing them to me, response wasI didn’t mean it like that, just throw it away.” I pushed back, saying they never even checked in on me when I was upset, and instead of any apology, response was , “It’s hard for me to see you struggling.”

I eventually sent a final message saying that I don’t want to keep having this conversation and that if they ever decide to apologize, they can let me know. Edit: my issue that I was trying to raise to them was how horrible it is to be treated differently because your single and get left out while also being worried I won’t find someone which I would love to. Now I feel awful. Should I have handled this differently?