Jindagi Jhand fir bhi itna ghamand?
Ladies and Gentleman here I present you the worst and best person I have ever meet. Yeha hasne-hasaune, proud hune, flex hanne dukha-pokhne k kasari linu xa you are free hai. I accept I am sadist, a kinda dukhi aatma but I wan't you to learn something.
*birth
I was born on middle middle class, childhood hospital dauda daud mai gayo jaasto lagxa. I don't remember much but I was hit by the destiny. (BC maile afule afailai dosh dinai mildaina, I was born this way.) But as you all know what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
* +2
Weed, alcohol, friends and a girl
Bass eti vayesi k chaiyo, 2 barsa hawa mai udaidea, Science lideko dist aayera school ma, 12 ma Phy ra chem ley tara dekhaideo. GF sanga ni nachada nachahadai xuteo, Kei garna sakinxa? Aha
Yo tinta milera I was cooked, esari pakaideo ki sala, maile lagvag afulai nai khana lagisakea thea. (Death)
But BC esto sano kura ley kei hunxa, aha
feri ektali back dera feri phy ma fail vaidea, baal ho?
*Peak depression
12 katauna sake xaina, everyone asking result k vayo, fail vayo vanne aat xaina( don't make this mistake hai), father lost his job, mother sick of tumor, friends sab padhna gaye. ani tyo sanga connect huna khojxu but teslai ta ma marey ni baal xaina. (Age of 17-18, year of 2015). I have come to realize toxic ta mai thea but if it hurts it fucking hurts. Finally 3rd attempt, ma physics katyo and my journey started towards bachelors. Depression ma I've lost ma hear thinking too much.
*Bachelors
Khasai padiyena, sathi haru vanyo, dulyo ghumyo chill. Voli k banne tahxaina just chill bihana 5:25 ma niskeo beluka 6 baje ghar, Corona aayo last year passed out. But eha mero arrangement ramro vanam ki euta first sem ma back lagyo baki sab katyo. Maya garne khasai himmat aayena, kapal navaye ni handsome nai dekhthea but aha aat garena. Euti afai kata bata interest dekhayera aai, mero bad side reveal gardea solti gayeb. ( I never showed her strength just weakness tyo pani navako, Sorry lady no regrets BTW). End end tira most were working, I was having trouble finding internship.
*Current Life
Midlife crisis, Unmarried & soon to be 28 and I fell in love. IDK if she knows but the way her eyes search me everytime she laughs and talks, I'm certified fool. She is bahuni and has a husband rexa, court marriage I never knew. It took me nearly 5 months to fall for her but one photo and everything is destroyed. Kei garna sakinxa ta? Left smoking and drinking too, ahile chiya khayera gastric banayera baseko xu. Old father mother kasari palne tenson xa, esto 1000 aru tenson xa, vandina but xa, but I know I'll handle it. "I'll be ok even if nothing is ok."
- ***Learnings**\* - Health over everything
- Euta future roadmap, k banne xora xori lai k banaune? it is most important
- Don't put too much emphasis on friends, you'll be lonely
- First failure was my carelessness, 2nd was my failure to stratize syllabus
- Yo sakesi k garne ta is more important (eha critical thinking a fast forward hunu parxa afno career liyera)
- No girl is greater than your life and don't love her too much ki you forget to love yourself
- Don't be too much dependent on others unless he/she wants to take you abroad
- Don't lose yourself trying to love her
- Find a way to earn early, kaile k hunxa nobody knows
- Bike chai belaima chadnu, danda kanda ghumnu, nature hernu, the killer of my depression
- Now my father thinks I'm a retard and has stopped expecting but trust me kei garna sakeko xaina, na bahira jana sakxu, na loksewa, office janxu, 2-3 hr tolauxu, kaam garxu aauxu
But trust me love chai jindagi ma ektali garnu, I'll carry her memories to grave although it pains. Sabai ko life estai hunxa xaina but sika 60% men we go through this, few get even worse. No addiction, no depression, only bunch of problems that can't go away. I know yo vanirakhnu jaruri xaina, thiyena pani but for someone it matters, kei learn gara, esto pani hudo rexa vanera.