numbness ruining all my relationships

when you feel indescribably overwhelming emotions unlike anything you’ve ever experienced, everything else in comparison feels so meaningless. i used to be someone who cared so deeply about things but now i could not give less of a fuck about anything anyone has to say to me and it is so difficult pretending like i care all the time. i don’t feel like myself anymore and i feel disgusting admitting this but it’s just the truth. obviously there’s only so much pretending i can do and my friends have mentioned that they feel like i’ve become dismissive of their issues which was never my intention at all and i feel so horrible for making anyone feel that way. it feels like i have fallen out of love with my boyfriend of three years which really hurts because i know deep down i do love him so much. he has been so supportive and patient throughout everything, i know he deserves so much better than this. he deserves the same love he gives to me which i am just no longer able to reciprocate, and again i feel horrible about that. i have seen a psychologist and all they have said is that this is normal and i will start to feel again over time. they say that i shouldn’t be worried about how others are feeling at the moment, but if i have that mindset im gonna lose everyone i care about. maintaining relationships while dealing with numbness caused by grief feels so impossible, i just don’t know what to do anymore