Opinions

I do not wish for reassurances, only thoughts and opinions on what to do.

It's been a while since I've been on here, but let me put you all up to speed. I've been suffering for the past 10 months with SOOCD and TOCD. One of the things I do, and I admit it is quite bad but I have to, is to watch Porn. Not just any porn, lesbian porn (I am a male). Now at some stage of watching my brain is making me believe that I would love to become a girl. MY GOD it feels too real. more real than the urges I face with SOOCD. One part of me feels the pleasure of thinking about it and the other warns me that it's just a well orchestrated lie on my emotions and thoughts.

Is there anyone else in the same boat as me? It feels like as I am on the cusps of defeating my SOOCD, this other monster rears it's ugly head. What are you thought.s (no pun intended)

(I made the same post on the HOCD reddit page)